Wednesday, August 25, 2010

I made out with Rpattz!!! (Sort of.)

Ahh it's Wednesday...hump day! Usually I would be stoked that it's semi-close to the weekend but today I just want to be in my bed, sleeping and dreaming of hot men who make me want to hump on this "hump day". It's not just because I love my sleep time, which I do....seriously I'm pretty sure I was born with chronic mono or narcalepsy. The main reason I want to be sleeping is because my dream of dating Rob Pattinson was interrupted by my stupid alarm clock.

The dream may not sound like much to some people but dude, even if I had a dream Robert Pattinson walked by me, accidentally tripped me and didn't even give a second glance as I was laying on the ground with a broken would still be a dream with Rpattz and is therefore better than all other dreams. In this dream I was staying at my dad and step mom's house and had to stay awake all night for some reason. About 5:00 in the morning two guys came in. One was Rpattz. Now, if this happened in real life, would elicit the reaction of "HOLY SHIT, ROBERT PATTINSON IS IN MY HOUSE!! I'M GONNA CRAP MY PANTS!" and then I'd need new pants. But for some reason I was cool and calm in my dream. THAT should have been my first sign that I was dreaming but I was oblivious. My mind probably told me "Hey Jamie, you're dreaming....and Rob Pattinson is in your dream so just pretend it's reality and don't wake up!!!"

The other guy (I can only assume was his manager or PR rep...something like that) and my dad told us we needed to rest for a few hours before we had to all leave to go somewhere and they left the house. Again, in real life I would be thinking "If Rpattz and I are in a bed resting....we aren't going to be 'resting'!!"
Would you be able to get sleep if you were laying next to him? Me either.

I was right...we didn't sleep, we did other things (Get your minds out of the gutter..but hehe I wish). We fell in and out of sleep (yes, in the same bed... it was fantastic!) and just layed there talking for hours. I know this may sound boring to some people but have you HEARD his accent??? The second he speaks, pants just fly off of woman everywhere, no joke! Way too soon, there was a knock on the door and we were told we needed to get up. We had to go to some conference but for some reason it looked more like a cafeteria mixed with a small college class. Don't mind makes it's own images. For some reason time had fast forwarded between us laying in the same bed and the conference because we were now sort of dating. I'm not gonna was awesome. Pure bliss and in my dream I was the happiest I've ever been. Yes I know this probably makes my life sad but I don't even care. At the conference we didn't sit near each other, I sat with my friend Amanda and he sat with Taylor Lautner. Like I said before, in real life I would be so star struck that I wouldn't be able to talk except to studder non-stop and form a bunch of non-words. In my dream I apparently was immune to their hotness and didn't care that they were famous heartthrobs. They were just actors who were completely normal to me...and I'd like to believe that's how I would be if I ever met them but nope! I'd turn into a newborn (human, not vampire)... pooping, peeing, drooling, and making coo-ing noises.

It looked a little something like this... minus the Comic Con stuff in the background

[Unfortunately this is the part where it gets sad and I hate to say it, but Rob Pattinson broke my little heart.] I was back and forth from my table to his in between lectures and he told me because of the media, we couldn't say that we were dating. He had to pretend to be dating someone else. Someone like a doctor or teacher. "Like that girl" he said, as a studious looking woman walked by his table. What I didn't understand was that I don't look like a super studious type but I'm not a blond bimbo looking chick either. So I just got extremely mad, said "Fine!" and stormed off back to my table. I went back and forth between my table and outside [not sure what I was doing because at this point I kept waking up from my dream but luckily I was able to fall back asleep and jump back into it.] Apparently I was friends with Taylor Lautner because him and I kept talking about it outside... and he eventually got Rob to change his mind, so we were back to dating. I sat down next to him at his table and he kissed me. Like really kissed me. A lot.  I remember thinking in my dream "So this is what it's like to kiss Robert's even better than it looks on screen!" Let me emphasize, IT DIDN'T FEEL LIKE A DREAM!

Eventually Amanda and I convinced them to skip their flight and come hang out with us at our house for the night so we could go out and have some drinks. Again, if this was real life, and Rpattz was at my house, I wouldn't be leaving my house let alone the bedroom, just sayin. I also probably wouldn't be drinking because I would want to remember the entire night (ya know, cuz one drink turns into twenty and pretty soon I'm Blackout Betty.) Then for some reason (this is where I get pissed off again in my dream) Amanda said "I don't think they can come over... my boyfriend is coming over tonight" Seriously, are you freaking kidding me?!?! Boyfriend?!?! IT'S ROB AND TAYLOR! It was at this point I knew that I was dreaming, because Amanda would never ever give up the opportunity to have these guys come hang out with us and I'm pretty sure she would break up with whoever she was dating at the time for a chance to get it on with a warewolf (or someone who plays one in a movie...even if he is 10 years younger than her.)

That was pretty much where my alarm clock went off and I was abruptly brought back to reality. Usually I would still be pissed off about being woken up from such an amazing dream but I'm looking on the bright side... and it's a VERY bright side, my friends. I know some people don't remember their dreams, some people know they are dreaming and some people dream in black and white. But I was given this gift of having extremely vivid colorful dreams..they feel so real that when I wake up, it doesn't feel like a dream, it feels like a memory. And sometimes months or years later, I will still remember the dream and think "Did I dream that, or did that really happen?" This is the only reason, I'm not mad about being woken up. Because to me, it feels like a memory. A memory of making out with Robert Pattinson. How many people can say they have that memory burned into their brain?

Shut up Kristen Stewart, I'm not talking to you.

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